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Infertility Options

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August 7, 2006

Posted by Kim

About This Editor: Kim is both a freelance writer and an imaging specialist at a major graduate school. She is a wife and mother to two children. She enjoys writing and working on her computer in her spare time.

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Most young couples dream of one day starting a family. When the time comes, some couples are lucky and get pregnant within the first few tries. Some take a little longer, but it eventually happens. Still others have absolutely no luck and even many years later still have no children. Infertility can be a devastating thing to a couple who so badly wants children, but there are several options to choose from should this situation arise.

When some couples encounter infertility, they choose to instead live a child free life. Some people think that by making this decision, the couple is missing out on one of the greatest things in life. Unfortunately, to some people, the costs of their other options are too large or maybe they are not comfortable with raising a child that is not completely their own. Child free living is a deeply personal choice. This means that the couple will just be the two of them for the rest of their lives. Some of these couples choose to adopt animals in place of children and are just as happy as those who have children. One of the positives of choosing this lifestyle is being completely free to do whatever you choose at a moments notice, something that couples with children no longer have the luxury of doing.

A second option would be adoption or foster parenting. These are two different things, but also very similar. Adoption is a more expensive process, but the child will be yours from that point onward. You also have the satisfaction of loving a child as your own that would otherwise not have a good home to go to. The child is not biologically yours, but emotionally is just as much yours. This option involves court proceedings to be able to put the adoption through. Foster parenting is very similar in that the children are not biologically yours, but in contrast, you do not have them forever. Some children you would have in your home for a few weeks and some for a few years and anywhere in between. You also get paid an allowance per child while they are in your home by children’s social services. This allowance helps pay for the children’s needs. Foster parenting itself can lead to adoption.

A third option is finding a surrogate mother. In this process, you find a woman who will carry your child for you. There are several ways this works. The woman can carry an embryo created by the husband’s sperm and the wife’s egg and that child is completely the biological child of the couple. Or the woman can carry her own egg fertilized with the husband’s sperm through in vitro fertilization and this child would only be biologically related to the husband. Another option here would be for the woman to carry an embryo made with another woman’s egg and another man’s sperm, completely unrelated to anyone involved. This is a very emotional process for all involved. Usually the couple is allowed to witness the birth and other important milestones during the pregnancy. The couple also generally pays for the medical expenses and sometimes some of the living expenses for the surrogate.

A fourth option would be going through infertility treatments such as in vitro fertilization and others. With these treatments, the couple is usually tested to determine where the problem lies. Often times, they will inject the husband’s sperm into the wife at her ovulation time hoping for fertilization to take place. In other cases, they will harvest the wife’s eggs and fertilize them in a Petri dish with either the husband’s sperm or a donor’s sperm and then implant the embryo’s in the wife’s uterus hoping that one or more will implant. Another option for the couple is for the woman to take fertility medications such as Clomid. With any fertility treatment, there is an increased risk for becoming pregnant with multiples, but for many, that is a small price to pay for having a child of their own. Fertility treatments of these types can also be quite expensive.

For the couple that encounters fertility problems, there are many different options for them. The decision is often a difficult one, but usually having to make such a decision brings the couple closer together. So whether they choose to be child free or to try some of the other options to have children, they must be completely happy and comfortable with their decision. Infertility does not mean that a couple has to live a sad and empty life. It can be overcome.