Play the Game When It Comes to Clothes
Read more articles on Life's Nuances and Let Me Share With You.July 29, 2008
Posted by Karen Amato Schwartz
July 29, 2008
Posted by Karen Amato Schwartz
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Recently, I had a Queen weekend. When Queen was in its heyday 25 years ago, I liked them well enough, but now, their music sounds a bit different to my ears. The fact that my teenage daughter likes them says something about the ageless aspect of their work. One of my favorite songs happens to be “Play the Game”, in which Freddie Mercury sings about how everyone needs to play the game and fall in love.
That phrase usually has negative connotations because folks who are honest feel they are not being true to themselves, and the implication that someone else is playing a game puts us on an immediate defensive. Many times, “play the game” is used as the means of appeasing someone in authority, such as a boss or parent. It’s thus considered living superficially by the rules but doing something entirely different undercover. When I was a young adult entering the workforce, I did whatever it took to play the game because I wanted to be a winner in the game. I wore what was expected, said what was expected, and eventually, the game was no longer a game; it had become real life.
Back in the winter, I published a set of articles for a client on what to wear for modern, jazz, ballet and yoga classes, as well as horseback riding. The underlying theme of each one is that there are valid reasons for doing so in terms of safety and comfort. What I’m going to emphasize in today’s column is that there is also an emotional aspect filled by playing the game and dressing as required. Call it team spirit, camaraderie, fitting in, whatever-as much as we be rebellious souls, there is a part of everyone that wants to blend in, at least with a group from which they wish acceptance.
Clothes have had a long history of being associated with identity; consider uniforms worn by the military, service organizations, some government employees, sport teams and private schools. Less formal organizations opt for less of a uniform, such as bowling team shirts, company softball team t-shirts, or medical personnel jackets. Conformity is found a lot in athletics, such as for competitive swimming or ice skating clothing, bicycling attire, and tennis togs. When you think about it, almost every activity has a “look” associated with it, and if you wish to be taken seriously, it’s a look you adopt. One accepts the colored belts in the martial arts and the stripes on a Marine’s sleeves just as much as the black-smocked ladies in upscale department stores accept their working dress.
What’s rather comical is that sometimes young people criticize a style of clothing not their own, believing it to be the true reckoning of another person’s total personality and character. I remember my daughter’s best friend, in about 5th grade, taking on the moniker of “anti prep” because she believed “preps” to be phony and materialistic. Even this morning, as I flipped through July’s Lucky Magazine, I saw a purse that was described as being less preppy if paired with certain garments. Again, I had to wonder what the world has against preppie-ness. I’ve always thought those items as classic, cultured and evoking a rich society, and what’s wrong with that? (If the truth be known, I bought dock-siders, wool sweaters, pleated skirts and designer bags in my early twenties to look like a preppie because that is a world I wished to inhabit.) Wearing such stuff made me feel different temporarily, and didn’t make me different person. It was called playing a game with clothing, and every one of us does it to some degree. There is nothing wrong with this. After all, clothes are usually worn for no more than 8 hours at a time. Years ago, there were standard outfits for church and public school, and some families even dressed for dinner. People were supposed to feel differently at those times.
We can only assume that Mr. Mercury meant to not fight loving feelings. Freddie, to sum up your short but illustrious career, you were a “Champion”, probably a “Best Friend”, you “Rocked” us, and your music will never “Bite the Dust”. Rest in peace.
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